I stood there like a sheep approaching the shearing shed dreading what was coming.
All I wanted to do in this season of my life was to settle in the comfort of my flock. I had just started to enjoy grazing on that green lush grass called comfort.
What I mean by that is that I had grown to love the place we called home and when time to leave it came I just wasn't ready.
I wasn't ready to part with all those loyal friendships cultivated and formed for more than a decade. Our kids had gone to our local school from nursery and they were not happy to leave without a fight.
Saying goodbye to our church family full of loving people who showed grace and support endlessly was one of the hardest realisation to come to terms with.
Still, change kept coming fast pushing us to face a pair of sharp blade shears waiting to cut off all that fluffy, cosy and soft covering we wore and were so use to.
But then again, change tend to come that way. Sometimes we 'plan' it, but mostly comes unpredicted. Someone wise said : To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
The truth is : When change came all I wanted to do was to ignore it,hide and run from it, but the best thing to do apparently it's to let the doors open wide, to let change come in.
Not to resist it, not to dread it, but to 'embrace' it.
But it was hard, really hard.
Born in the countryside, I have witnessed a few times the sheep in the hand of the sheerer (change), they are petrified. Some shake so hard you can see their pounding hearts through their skin. They are afraid of the cuts they may get, the pain the pressure applied in order to keep them in the process so they will not run away and hurt themselves even more.
Who would blame them? But there was always this sense of surprise and amazement seeing them come out on the other side. They looked different, light and almost unrecognisable.
Starting a new life after change is hard, I can't lie and dress it as wonderful experience, sometimes it is, most times it's not. But change is what we are made for. To change is to be transformed into someone better.
Apostle Paul spoke of the same thing when he said:
“But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.”
2 Corinthians 3:18 KJV
We can't be better unless we change. As we embrace the process of change it changes us.
So my dear friend, change will come to all of us and often times not without its cuts and bruises, but if we decide to go with it I can assure you that we will come out of it as different people, better and much closer to becoming the ones we long to be.
Do you resist change? What is the thing that you dread the most during change?
I have come to realisation that there are three ways we look to when we need help, strength and answers.
We know we are looking down when all we see is dismay. We are discouraged with ourselves or the circumstances surrounding us and we can't find a way out -- all we see is hopes turned into dust and darkness that fills our path. Yes, not even a ray of light in the end of our tunnel.
When we look sideways or at eye level we are looking and expecting people to be our answer. We are searching for help to come from around us. We awake each day with our eyes and hands open for anyone, anything to get us out of the pit we are in .... still, disappointment is what usually awaits for us around that corner.
But then, there is this other option: the one when we can choose to look up. Here we are not waiting on 'the strength of the hills' so to speak, not looking for the hands of the mighty to save us and to get us out of problems, but we are expecting and waiting from the one and only who can answer fully to all our needs.
"Where does my help come from?"... asks the psalmist.
“I lift up my eyes to the mountains – where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.”
Psalm 121:1-2 NIVUK
Disappointment, discouragement and dismay are always signs of us looking at the wrong source for help and answers. Like someone beautifully put it: Look around you and you'll get distressed, look within you and you'll be depressed, look up at Jesus and you will be at rest.
Where is your tendency to look first when you have a problem or a challenge? Has that path choice been satisfactory to finding what you were looking for?